Early May brought me to one month before crazy town. I had one month of ‘normal’ life left before wedding season and packing season began, and wanted to live it to the fullest. As my calendar filled with activities I was “just trying to squeeze in” I felt my stress level inching towards its ceiling. There wasn’t enough time. There wasn’t enough energy, and I still had weeks of school left to teach well.

Even with my rising stress levels, I kept trying to do more, which only lead to more stress. After a particularly busy two weeks (something on the calendar literally everyday, weekday evenings and weekends), I felt like I was at my breaking point. I was starting to get a cold, and I was exhausted. Enter, the fateful text…

“Roomie date at urgent care after school?” A close contact of my roommates had COVID running through her family, and it had gotten close enough my roommate had been exposed. That cold I had been feeling coming in warranted I go with her for testing- just to be safe. We sat in the living room that night waiting for results, pondering the consequences of little plus signs. Mine came to my email first…. I looked up at her with wide eyes. “Uh-oh.” She didn’t like that look, especially since her results hadn’t come through yet. Mine was positive. An hour later, her results still weren’t in, so she finally called the urgent care, “Oh. Sorry, we’re not sure why yours didn’t come through- you’re negative.”

Wait, what?!?! Irony of all ironies, I picked it up unknowingly from an unknown source, and her known exposure had left her healthy. I began to cancel plans as my roommate packed a bag to stay at her parents. With each phone call I made, each email or text I sent, instead of feeling the burden of quarantine and fear of COVID, each call lifted a small weight. A meeting, a dinner, a hangout, stress lifted, one cancelled plan at a time. Instead of burdensome, the prospect of quarantine filled me with freedom.

“Be still and know that I am God.” A whisper began in my ear. While my symptoms remained mild, those words tumbled around in my head. Between naps, “Be still and know that I am God.” While I cooked, “Be still and know that I am God.” While I spent hours catching up on the mounting grading pile, “Be still and know that I am God.” The four walls that have felt confining during different seasons of COVID now brought freedom, rest and joy.

“Trust me.” God seemed to be saying. “Don’t try to take these next steps on your own… trust me instead.”

A week after my symptoms cleared and my quarantine finished, I came back from a short camping trip with some friends. I was talking to my roommate about my awe in how much I had accomplished in one afternoon- not only had I fully unpacked my suitcase, my car, the two coolers of food, and done two loads of laundry after spending the morning packing up a campsite and tent,- I also made rounds and dropped off two items to friends that had found their way into my things. “I usually come home and crash after a quick trip like this!” I laughed as we chatted in the hallway.

“What were we just talking about?” She asked me- shoot. I had no idea… the camping trip?

“We were just talking about being still and resting in the Lord. How HE provides just the amount of strength you need for the day. Look at how he so faithfully provided – you really needed to get all of this done today, and he gave you JUST the amount of strength you needed to do it.”

“Trust me.” The message was loud and clear. As I’d been relying on myself to finish my time in Southfield, God was reminding me to rely on Him. He forced me to rest, and reminded me that the strength to do anything never comes from within myself, but instead, comes from daily resting in HIM, and seeking HIS strength for each day.

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Prayer Points

• Please pray for the Lord’s continued whispers of comfort and peace in my goodbyes that are now happening everyday.
• Please pray for community and connection in the hello’s I get to say in just a couple of weeks!
• Please pray for safety and health in travel- driving travels as I transfer belongings to my parents and drive to Atlanta for checkout at my organization headquarters, as well as flying when I leave for Kenya on July 8th.