I ended my afternoon sitting on top of a water tank with a teenager, feeling just a little bit rebellious as I watched the clouds roll by sipping iced-spiced chai. We talked about the grandeur of the clouds we saw, half a world away having friends and family stare up at the same sky in cold drizzly England or wet snowy Michigan. We chatted about the mind bogglingness of zooming into the microscopic level as we’ve been talking about electrons in chemistry, and she was talking about scale in math class. We talked about her attempt to “twizzle her body around” (read in your best British accent) as she tried climbing out a too small window in the library on a whim during her study hall “just because she thought she could fit”. The sugar was left out of our iced spiced chai’s, so they weren’t as good as they could’ve been, but on top of the water tank, the breeze cooled us off even as the equitorial sun beat down through the white fluffy clouds interspersed with soaring birds at great heights.

Carefree afternoons are rare, but today marks the beginning of our “midterm” four-day weekend so we both felt a little lazy. This student is my mentee, we’ve been meeting now almost weekly for a year and a half. Sometimes, our conversations are light, other times, heavy. Today was definitely a “light” day, full of joy and nothingness.

She’s in my sixth period this year. We chatted about her new lab partner, someone the year below her and a friend of her brothers. The kid behind her talks a lot, still…but always *just* quiet enough he doesn’t disturb the whole class to the point I correct him. Her lab partner is usually really quiet, but today in lab, his goofy side came out.

We did my favorite lab of the whole year today, the flame test lab. Ya know, the one where the fire turns colors?! The one that made me decide to become a chemistry teacher? Yep. It was great. When I walked into my classroom this morning, I was met with my 5th period twin- constantly reminding me I can’t tell her and her sister apart. While being harassed again for not realizing it was the wrong twin (to be fair, I thought it was E, but Z is in my first period, so how was I to know?!) I realized I’d left something at my house that we were going to use in the lab.

E insisted she come with me, just as Z walked in and couldn’t be left out of the fun. The three of us started the 100 yard trek to my house and they each grabbed one of my elbows, squeezing me into an identical twin sandwich. We laughed and giggled as we jumped the curb in tandem and turned sideways to squeeze through the hedge. Students gawked as we drew attention with our outbursts of joy early in the morning, most of the onlookers still not yet awake themselves.

I sent E off to Spanish and began the explanation of our lab. Soon the room was dark, lit up by color changing flames and cell phone flashlights. Squeals of delight as crimson red, seafoam green, and dandelion yellow flames appeared almost out of nowhere. Eyes twinkled in delight as they looked through a prism to see different iterations of the rainbow in blocks of color. One of my particularly joyful students inquired if there might be ANY other solutions… unable to deny him the joy I feel every time I do this lab, I rummaged up some Lithium Chloride from the back and smiled inwardly as his flame turned a crisp magenta.

After a snafu of spilled chemical at the end of first period I struggled to calm my mind as my AP kids worked through their assignment for the day. The chemical had dumped all over my hand after a student had unexpectedly backed into me. “Acute toxicity. Target organs: central nervous system.” the safety data sheet had read. “If contact with skin, wash thoroughly.” Welp. For inhalation, eye damage, or ingestion it suggested medical treatment. For skin contact? Just a wash. I’d probably be okay.

One of my students could read my stress and asked if I was doing okay. After reading her the sheet, she very kindly said, “You are handling this so well. I’d be a puddle on the ground right now if I was you.” I smiled. I guess I was okay. At the end of my period, a different student asked me how long I was planning to stay at RVA. I responded with my typical, “For now, I’m just here… right now this is where the Lord has me.” She smiled and said, “You should stay for a while. RVA needs you.”

Why do I mention each of these things? Well, they’re really each a direct answer to my prayer of yesterday.

It’s been a very busy first half of the term:

As NHS advisor, I guided my NHS students in the coordinating of our school wide multi-cultural night event:

As part of the freshman sponsor team, we’ve been gearing up for “field sales” (essentially student run concessions- see my team working on posters for advertising below!):

As an interim leader, I’ve been emailing, calling, meeting and booking a trip that hits four different locations in northern Kenya for 14 seniors come the third week of March as part of our “Interim” program.
As AP Chem teacher, we’ve been running a double period of class this term, the second period they meet with me we run a lab every day. Melting chocolate to measure the speed of light, separating grape kool-aid into red and blue samples, synthesizing pretty crystals, calculating the kinetics of a burning candle, all in the name of chemistry.
Oh, and did I mention that I had a 2022 graduate living with me the first five weeks of term? We chatted many late nights, sharing about shared similar life experiences, me sharing how God has brought me healing and forgiveness, her sharing as she’s in the midst still of pain. We washed dishes together lots, cooked together (doing lessons most nights we cooked 😉 SUPER fun!) and whining about not wanting to do work together until we decided to watch a movie instead.

While all of these things have been really good, they’ve each been a thing. Something added to my plate, taking time and energy. It’s easy to get lost in the work, and yesterday I felt lost. In my devotions I prayed about being seen.

When I was in Uganda over Christmas break and my friend Rachael was giving her Aunt a tube of toothpaste as a gift, her Aunt got emotional as she responded in humility and gratitude, “The Lord sees me.” It’s stayed with me, that idea of being seen. El Roi- the God who sees.

I was starting to feel invisible as I trudged through the days, so I prayed I might be seen, sitting on my front porch with a fire burning in the chiminea. The very next day:

The twins, escorting me to my home and back: seen.

My student mentioning how well I was handling a spill: seen.

A student suggesting I stay here at RVA in exactly what I’m doing: seen.

Sitting on top of a water tower, laughing and chatting together: seen.

El Roi is the God who sees. He see’s each of us, right where we are, right where he put us, and for that I am so so thankful.

Prayer Points

• Would you pray for rest over this four day weekend, for myself and other staff members, as well as our students alike? I have plans for a short camping trip at our nearby national park. I’m hopeful some time away in nature will be super restful and rejuvenating!
• Would you pray for this second half of term? That I would find healthy rhythms and routines? The grading is a lot. There’s still lots of planning to be done for that trip, the actual field sales, and meetings with NHS officers. Adjusting again to living alone. So many opportunities to pour the love of Christ into students but love that has to come from Him as my reserves are shallow, and His are deep and never ending.