Overnight. That’s how fast I went from feeling totally on top of things to completely overwhelmed. Was I an entire unit planned in advance? Yes I was! Was I completely caught up on grading? Miraculously. Was I able to spend my evenings taking my dog for a walk, or even going to bed early? Yes.

So how is it yesterday I found myself on my couch almost in tears at the daunting-ness of the tasks I was facing? How? Because in a snap, one too many meetings stacked into my lunch and prep periods, coincidentally all my classes have tests on the same day, and my cooking co-teacher is sick. This means I need two tests ready, two new units prepped and ingredients sourced, but all outside the normal teaching hours since those are now filling with department meetings, student mentor meetings, and sponsoring meetings. For AP Chemistry, it means finding myself in my classroom until earliest 8:30pm so that I can be there for our traditional pre-test evening study hall hours, snacks in hand. Luckily I had cookie dough in the freezer I could just pull out and bake while I ate dinner so I didn’t have to stress about having student turn up to a snackless evening.

Wait, but you’re giving tests… that means extra time in the classroom to prep those units, right? You can work while your students take the test? You would think so, but nope. I am scheduled tomorrow to go into Nairobi for biometrics (fingerprints and mugshot) for my new resident card that expired while I was on home assignment in America. Just a casual hour and a half drive one way with no way of knowing. No big deal, right?

And so, I find myself in my classroom at 10pm, ready to turn in for the night, yet not ready to leave since I’ve made little progress on prepping those next two units. I have lessons ready enough for Thursday and Friday in regular chemistry, so I decided I can finish that later. It’s AP where I need the whole unit ready to go for logistics and prepping things on our online learning platforms that has me concerned. I worked some on updating the calendar and figured, it’ll have to be good enough. Maybe I can get a little more progress made on it tomorrow, but I may not be quite as ready for this next unit as I have been the last two.

Literally ready to close the books for the night, I found this sticky-note I’d written last year on the first page of this unit:

“Dear self, this can be a super cool unit with some awesome depth, but really ONLY if you study. I know term is getting busy, I know you don’t want to re-write your notes, but students need you to!” Marked at the end with a hashtag labeled #RememberN********* (students name redacted) I’ll be honest. I have no idea why I’m remembering N. He was a great student, I taught him in AP Calc and in AP Chem. He LOVED chem. He thrived. He asked lots of good questions, and that made him so fun to teach, but I have no idea why this particular student prompted this sticky note. But I’m glad it did. I’m glad for the reminder that the little bit of extra work it takes me to get 100% organized for a lesson makes it that much better for my students learning from me. And so, I’ll put in that little bit of extra time, that oomph that is needed to make my lessons run smooth.

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I wrote that bit above literally at 10pm when I found that sticky note. It’s been some time since I found that sticky note. It really did inspire me- to be aware of how I show up to my classes, to follow through with students who need it, to get grades in on time, and to generally be a little more diligent. I also remembered why I’m supposed to remember N, my brain does this sometimes, pulls up something random when I let it sit on the back burner for a while. I’m supposed to remember N because of something profound he said, the biggest complement and the biggest slap in the face: “You were the best teacher I ever had, I learned SO much from you on the days you were ON.”

With that tiny qualifying clause at the end of his statement, he called me out. He knew when I had fully prepared myself, and he knew when I had phoned it in, attempting to simply read off of my notes left from the year before without taking the time to REALLY know my stuff. It’s an incredible reminder to find now, as I’m halfway through my first term back at RVA, but I love how the Lord reminded me two-fold.

What I saw on the note was, “the kids need you.” It was a reminder that I don’t just teach chemistry, I teach students, and my students are people. Someone once said to me something along the lines of, even though this isn’t your first time teaching this stuff, it IS their first time learning it. This is THEIR first time through the curriculum, their first time encountering this new information. I need to be patient when they are frustrated, I need to love them well, I need to follow up on the kids who are behind, who are struggling a little bit more than others. But I was also reminded as I mulled further that I still need to put in the work. I can’t just sit back and let my classes run themselves, I need to be fully present- keep working ahead and keep working hard.

Prayer Points

Please be in prayer for health! My roommate and I have both been in a pretty constant state of some variety of a cold since the term started six weeks ago. It’s been rough. Please pray our bodies would kick these viruses once and for all!

Please be in prayer for SEW (Spiritual Emphasis Week) that has been happening this week. We have a worship team and a speaker who has been sharing during daily evening sessions. God is on the move! Pray students would see Him clearly and come to know Him more through the worship and teaching taking place this week. Please pray that we as staff would have wisdom to follow up and walk alongside students wrestling with various different heart issues that this time may be stirring up within them.